No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
These 21 Women Share What Sexual Harassment In The Military Is Really Like
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..