D3 body, D1 cock
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.