i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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