if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Are we still banned from the library?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
