I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
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The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
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That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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