Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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