I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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