Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
My vagina is officially offended.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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