I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
