Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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