VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
