ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
