we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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