I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
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