Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
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