no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
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Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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