It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
ok first of all what the fuck
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
