I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
