I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
