Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
