When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Randomize
