watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
