My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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