you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
