the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Panties = found
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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