make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
