Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize