Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
