dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
