i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
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