my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
