Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
