I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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