i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
