Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
