C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I am puke
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
