Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Is it penis luge time yet?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
We were destined to go to rehab together
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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