Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
