at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
