called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
