oh god the rape fog is back!
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
