I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize
