Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
