You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
my sisters under your porch take her home
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
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