He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
