im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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