He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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