Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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