It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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