Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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