Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
